


Love You Through This

by WhereAreThePickles



Category: L.A. Noire
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Because of Reasons, Because's he's gay, Begging, Boys In Love, Cole has Survivor's Guilt, Cole is Confused, Coming In Pants, Coming Out, Frottage, Gentle Kissing, Gentlemen Kissing, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I'm Going to be Real with You Guys, I'm a sucker for those, It Gets Heated Quick, Kitchen Sex, Love Confessions, M/M, Marie is Divorcing him, Men Crying, Neck Kissing, Sleep After Sex, Stefan is a Bean, Stefan's A Tease, Supportive Stefan, These Two Should've Been Canon But Oh Well, War Themes, a little bit ooc, cuddling after sex, real men cry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:54:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24950404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhereAreThePickles/pseuds/WhereAreThePickles
Summary: The evening after the 'June Ballard' case was solved was nothing short of interesting. The Blue Room was lively, sure, and the woman who was supposed to be on stage was in definite duress. But of course, Roy Earle was an asshole.After watching Roy slap the shit out of said woman for seemingly no reason. It was decided that Stefan and Cole would celebrate Cole's promotion to the robbery desk in a way that wouldn't associate themselves with that salmon-suit-wearing dick.As it turns out, Stefan ended up making them dinner at his apartment. Simplicity at its best.However, simplicity alone could never stop this night from evolving.
Relationships: (Past) Hank Merrill/Cole Phelps, Stefan Bekowsky/Cole Phelps
Comments: 10
Kudos: 17





	Love You Through This

**Author's Note:**

> Angst, fluff, and smut. The unholy triad of dysfunction.

The evening after the 'June Ballard' case was solved was nothing short of interesting. The Blue Room was lively, sure, and the woman who was supposed to be on stage was in definite duress. But of course, Roy Earle was an asshole. 

After watching Roy slap the shit out of said woman for seemingly no reason. It was decided that Stefan and Cole would celebrate Cole's promotion to the robbery desk in a way that wouldn't associate themselves with that salmon-suit-wearing dick.

As it turns out, Stefan ended up making them dinner at his apartment. Simplicity at its best.

However, simplicity alone could never stop this night from evolving.

\--------------

"I can't believe Hopgood is an informant for Earle! I call bullshit on that." Stefan scoffed while picking up a plate to wash. "I hate Roy Earle. When you make it to vice Cole, I hope you never have to be in the same room with him, let alone work with him." Stefan rinses the plate and sets it in the drying rack before picking up another plate and beginning to wash it.

"You don't need to protect me Bekowsky. I can take care of myself." Cole sighed as he leaned up against the counter opposite Stefan.

"I know that, but you have a reputation to maintain. All of L.A. knows of you as 'The Golden Boy' and if we learned anything about Earle tonight, he'll taint everything you're known for, just for his own amusement." Stefan picks up this clean plate and puts it with the other one in the drying rack before picking up a frying pan and beginning to wash it.

"I appreciate your concern Stefan. But like I said, I can take care of myself." Cole glanced down and shuffled his feet.

"Thank you for dinner Stefan."

He chuckled while scrubbing. "You already thanked me for that."

Cole scratched the back of his neck. "Thank you for doing the dishes then."

Stefan turned around to look at Cole, frying pan in one hand and a sponge in the other. He raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay Cole? You're acting different all of a sudden."

Cole looked everywhere but in Stefan's direction. "Yeah - I'm okay. I just have a question to ask you."

A thick cloud of silence filled the room.

Without a single shred of fear, Cole made dead eye contact with Stefan.

"Can I blow you?"

Stefan didn't mean to drop both the pan and the sponge, but in his defense, those were by far the last words he expected to come out of Cole's mouth.

"What?" He asks, wondering if he just imagined that.

Cole simply looks from Stefan's face and down to the ground where the pan sat in a small puddle of dishwater at his feet. "You heard me."

With that reminder, Stefan bent downward to retrieve the pan, he also used it as an excuse to not look at Cole for a moment. _Was it hot in his kitchen?_ It was suddenly very hot in the kitchen.

Cole sighed. "Stefan."

"Hm?"

"You can say no. It's okay."

Stefan tossed the sponge and pan into the sink, letting the clanking of metal against metal reflect his shock and confusion. "What gave you the idea I would say no?"

Cole perked up a little. "So I can?"

Stefan groaned, running a damp hand over his face. He has to be dreaming. There's no way in hell this is happening. "Why do you want to?"

"I don't know. I just want to."

Stefan lowered his hand to glare at Cole. "All that does is make me wonder more." Stefan sighed and nearly rolled his eyes. "There's always more to you Cole."

Cole's expression fell. The faux boldness melted away, Cole looked vulnerable. And Stefan was right, there was more to this than just a sudden, off-the-cuff offer.

Cole's lips formed one solid line as he stared directly at the ceiling, blinking rapidly.

"Marie left me." He choked out as he sunk down onto the floor of Stefan's kitchen. His bottom lip began to quiver, his cheeks were burning red and his eyes were shining. Stefan sat down as well, a look of concern resting firmly on his face. He placed a hand on Cole's knee, wordlessly urging him to continue.

"She took the girls. She's forbidden me to see them until they're adults." That's when the tears fell.

"What happened Cole?"

"I told her the truth. About what happened during the war. About why I've been acting so strange since I came back. I told her about people I met. People who lived. People who died. People who never deserved to die. People who could've lived if I wasn't so selfish. People who - who…." Cole sobbed, "I loved."

Stefan brought Cole into a hug as Cole began to sob harder. "He died because of me Stefan. He died trying to protect me, because he loved me too." His voice was raw, Stefan could hear that his throat was hurting from the sobbing. He was rubbing soothing circles into Cole's shoulders, as he didn't know what to say and didn't know if he should say anything. He just wanted Cole to know that he was here.

"When I got back home, I didn't know how to love Marie the way I did before the war. I had forgotten how. I loved her, but I couldn't _love_ her anymore. She knew something was wrong, but, I don't think she expected that."

"Why'd she forbid you from your daughters?"

Cole bit his lip. "She doesn't want me to influence them in that way."

Stefan leaned back. "Jesus Christ." He put a hand up to his head. "They're six. How are you gonna 'influence' them? By being a good father? By trying to show them stability?"

Cole sighed. "I don't know." His eyes were dry by now, but his face was still flushed. Suddenly, his eyes widened and the water returned to them.

"What if she goes to the press?! The second that the headline hits. I'm gonna be dead! Literally. Someone will kill me!"

Stefan shook his head. "How do you know she's gonna do it? She wouldn't do that to you. She still loves you."

Cole sobbed. "You're right." He made eye contact with Stefan. "I'm so distracted - and - confused. I don't know what to think anymore. Who to trust or - or -."

He looked at Stefan with pure fear in his eyes. Stefan got the message. He smiled softly.

"I'm not gonna do anything to hurt you Cole. I'd be a hypocrite if I did." Cole's eyes went back to a normal size before he smiled through his tears.

"I had no idea Stefan."

Stefan's smile grew. "Cole. You may have gone to Stanford, and you may be able to quote poetry like it's your damn address. But you have no idea when someone is hitting on you."

Cole's voice is almost a whisper. "I thought you were just being kind."

"Nope. I was flirting with you. Been doing so since the day we met."

Cole chuckled and facepalmed. "I was so oblivious."

"Well now that I got you to smile…" Stefan gestured with his head towards the sink. "What the hell was that offer really about?"

Cole blushed. "I wanted to make new regrets." Stefan raised an eyebrow. "Not. Not that I would regret it - you, I wouldn't regret you. But I would regret involving you in all of this. I. I guess I just wanted to take my mind off of everything without hurting myself in the process."

Cole cleared his throat and made eye contact with Stefan.

"I know that you're the only person who would never hurt me. You care so much about everyone. But I could hurt you. Just because of the way I act. I hurt people. I push people away. I make enemies. I lose people and wonder where I went wrong, wonder why I'm not the one who's lost." Cole paused. "I don't want to hurt you too."

Stefan took Cole's hands in his, shook his head and sighed. "Cole. I don't have the words or the ability to truly help you. But I do know that no matter what, you deserve love too. You sacrifice yourself for everyone else, every day. You said you were selfish earlier, but you're the most selfless person I know. You say that you hurt people, but I watch you help people daily." He paused. "If you're trying to right the wrongs within yourself, then you're making amazing progress." Stefan wiped a tear off of Cole's cheek. "I'll never be able to make you feel like your pre-war self. I'll never be able to help you earn forgiveness from those who aren't around, and I'll never be able to convince your ex-wife to give you the benefit of the doubt. But what I can do…. is love you. I can love you through this. All of these inner battles, I can love you through. After all, I already do. I love you. I love how smart you are, how brave you are and how vulnerable you can be. You're determined to do anything once you set your mind to it, and if you do set your mind to it...one day you'll be able to love yourself as much as I love you."

Cole sighed and smiled. The cloud of chaos that normally resided in his eyes was completely dissipated, the worry was gone, and nothing but love remained. He leaned forward and closed the gap between them. It was soft and slow, deliberate.

And it meant everything.

Stefan pulled back with a small smack of their lips, just far enough that their noses brushed slightly when he changed angles and dove back in. It caught Cole by surprise at first, confusion seizing control over his mind for a moment before he gained confidence and began to reciprocate. He brought his free hand up to Stefan's neck, pulling him in slightly, but still testing the waters, waiting for Stefan to respond.

Stefan's hand migrated up to Cole's hair, cradling the back of his head as he pushed their chests together, then kept pushing until Cole's back collided with a thud on the cabinet door and a groan punched out of his lungs. Stefan adjusted their hands, intertwining them together now as he changed the tempo of their kiss to something more insistent - desperate even.

Cole matched the latter descriptor eagerly, hands tightening against Stefan as he pushed back against his lips readily, hungrily. As if every case, every conversation, every look between them. Had been a precursor to this.

Cole pulled away, despite it all. He gazed hazily at Stefan before murmuring, "We're on the kitchen floor," and dear god his voice shouldn't sound _this_ wrecked from just a kiss. But it does.

Stefan lightly smiled before nuzzling into Cole's neck, placing small kisses on the new ground offered from when Cole first departed from their kiss. He could hear Cole sighing as Stefan laid a trail of gentle kisses up his neck before stopping at the juncture where his jaw and neck meet. He could feel Cole's pulse quicken underneath his lips as he licked the spot and began to lightly suck on it. He knew he was driving Cole crazy, and decided to push his luck, so he began to alternate between licking and sucking on the same spot. Cole's gasp was like liquid gold to Stefan when he bit down on the spot before soothing over it with his tongue.

"Do you want to go somewhere else?" He whispered into Cole's ear before returning to the spot, sucking on it with earnest.

Cole's breath hitched as he breathed out a small "Yes." Cole could feel Stefan smirk against his neck. "I'm gonna need more than that." He began to fumble with Cole's collar as he trailed the neck kisses back down again to the starting point. But he didn't stop there, he decided to go back up again but aggravatingly slow, playing with Cole's impatience. "Couch?" He asked between two kisses. "Bed?" He mumbled into Cole's neck. He pulled away, looking down at Cole, "Or are we staying right here?"

Cole already looked utterly debauched. His face was flushed, his shirt was crumpled, tie askew, hair all fucked, pupils blown. He looked beautiful.

"Wow." Stefan breathed out. He looked at the spot on Cole's neck and smiled when he saw that it was already developing into a perfect hickey. 

Stefan chuckled "You said that you wanted to move somewhere else earlier, but honestly, I don't think you _can_ move." He saw that Cole's eyes glanced downward for a second, before snapping back up at Stefan. He followed Cole's glance and discovered that his earlier actions had caused Cole to develop a tent out the front of his suit pants.

"Oh."

Just seeing that alone got Stefan stirring.

Stefan swung one of his legs over Cole's and slowly pulled himself forward until he was hovering over Cole's hips.

"Is this okay?"

Cole stared up at Stefan. He looked so hot and cute and cared so much about him that Cole wasn't sure if he should boop Stefan's nose or let Stefan fuck him into the next day. He wanted the latter, since his pants were painfully tight, but he knew that they should take things slow, he _needed_ to take things slow. Stefan's auburn hair was tousled and his lips were red and kiss swollen; Cole could feel the proof of Stefan's arousal pressed against his thigh.

"Yes." Cole breathed out before experimentally thrusting against Stefan, the friction felt blissful against his throbbing cock, causing Cole to let out a strangled gasp. "Definitely okay."

Stefan's look of concern quickly turned into a grin. In a flash, he grabbed Cole's wrists, pinned them over his head and crossed them. "Stay put." He said as he let go of them. Stefan traced his fingers over Cole's body, continuously trailing down south, leaving ghosts of touches down his sides, over his stomach, his upper thighs.

"Stefan." Cole breathed out in caution before Stefan could go any further.

"Yes?"

"It's." Cole's cheeks flushed. "It's been awhile."

Stefan nodded and smiled lovingly at Cole, as if to say 'it's okay' before continuing. He cupped Cole's dick slightly, massaging the bulge, Cole moaned, losing himself in the feeling of Stefan applying pressure just where he needed it most. But Cole wanted more than this. He wanted _more_.

"Please." Cole begged, and Stefan obliged by grinding against him. With their clothed erections rubbing against one another, Cole couldn't help but moan. With Stefan on top of him, pinning him down, and fucking rutting against him. He didn't stand a chance. It was all so much. He was going to get off like this, cum in his pants like a teenager, all because of Stefan.

Stefan rolled his hips again, his hard cock trapped by his suit pants and pressed against Cole's groin just right, a groan spilled from his mouth as he claimed Cole's lips into a chaste kiss. Stefan pulled away, locking eyes with Cole "I want to see you." He rolled his hips and bit back a moan, "Get off like this." He rolled his hips, painfully slow. "Watch you." Another slow roll. "Come undone."

Cole moans as his hips involuntary stutter forward, and oh god the friction between them, the feeling is so delicious, that he continues to thrust forward, mindlessly doing it, chasing the high. He screwed his eyes shut and threw his head back, obscene noises spilling over his lips.

He was giving Stefan a show, every noise was urging him on and Cole's face looked utterly pornographic. 

Cole's hands were clenching and unclenching against the cabinet, he wanted to touch Stefan, but he couldn't defy the orders that were given. Stefan was still rolling his hips agonizingly slow; wanting to make this last as long as possible, since neither of them were going to, at this rate.

"Faster." Cole moaned out, surprised he could make words. But Stefan didn't increase his speed at all. 

He went _slower_.

A whimper escaped Cole's lips. He was desperate at this point. As a sign of protest, he lowered his arms off of the cabinet behind him.

"I'll stop entirely if you don't put your arms back up."

Cole huffed as he put his arms back up. "You're a tease."

"And a good one at that, right?" Stefan smiled before he roughly thrusted forward sending needy noises out of Cole and into the air. 

Stefan returned to the snails' pace he was going at earlier, bringing a frustrated rise out of Cole. Who knew exactly what he had to do.

 _"Please."_ Cole begged with every ounce of desperation in his body. 

He had to screw his eyes shut and throw his head back from the intensity alone when Stefan began to rock up against him with all he had. Stefan titled Cole's chin back a little before claiming him into a rough kiss, swallowing all of the moans that Cole made, plunging his tongue in roughly, practically fucking his mouth. Stefan pressed against the fully developed hickey on Cole's neck with his fingers and Cole couldn't take it anymore. Control was lost. And the world exploded into a burst of white behind his eyes. The pleasure was overwhelming and he was left gasping for air when it was all over.

He opened his eyes to see Stefan in an equally euphoric state. Stefan smiled at him and choked out the word "Wow." Before rolling off of Cole and staring at the ceiling.

Cole was vaguely aware of the wet mess in his pants, but he was too blissed out to give a damn. He reached out and grabbed Stefan's hand. He breathed out "I love you." Into the air, before he realized that he just said that but, once again, he too was deep in the afterglow to care about consequences.

Stefan mumbled "That's nice." Before he nuzzled his way onto Cole's chest, an arm was wrapped around him as he began to lightly rub circles into Cole's stomach with his free hand.

Stefan laughed. "We're on the kitchen floor." He looked up at Cole. "And I don't think _I_ can move now."

Cole chuckled. "My, how the tables have turned."

"They did, didn't they?" Stefan whispered while laying down completely on top of Cole. Who started laughing.

"Comfortable?"

Stefan leaned up a little bit. "I mean, you make a good pillow." Seemingly to prove his point, he put his head down on Cole's chest and nuzzled in, smiling slightly as he listened to Cole’s heartbeat.

“Do I now?” Cole started carding his fingers through Stefan’s hair, appreciating the simplicity of everything that was currently happening. It had been a long time since anything was simple. He noticed that Stefan’s breathing against him began to slow down, and that his eyelids were slowly opening and closing.

_He’s fighting to stay awake._

Cole smiled at the sight. It was a good thing that it was Friday night, they could use the weekend to recover from sleeping on the floor. Cole sighed as he felt his worries seep away, earnestly basking in the moment and staring off into the dimly-lit kitchen.

Just for a moment, L.A. was pure and silent. For Cole knew that even though everything might not work out perfectly, he would, without a doubt, have Stefan standing beside him every step of the way, through anything that would come to pass.

As if on queue, Stefan began to snore softly, cementing Cole's previous thought as fact.

Cole felt himself dozing off as well, calmness being the contributing factor. He felt whole again, a feeling of which he hadn't felt for the longest time, and it felt purely wonderful.

**Author's Note:**

> I have another fic in the works so stay tuned everybody! Thank you for reading and don't hesitate to provide constructive criticism, I'll take it to heart since I'm trying to improve my writing in general.
> 
> Thank you!


End file.
